when i was younger, i knew i was different, i had very few friends that mean anything to me. spare me the pity because i don't need any. i choose to be closed from peoples emotions and drama. it save me from heartache n disappointment. but in essence, i awaited that right person to come to me n understand my view life.

i didn't start looking like i do now until the beginning of highschool where everything changed. i guess i just followed trends (converse, topshop etc) i look back now thinking, why i just like them? was i really degrading myself in a sense?

i admit that i did. today i stand with purpose n originality.

i raise my standards higher.

as i wrote on my profile. I'm no longer looking for simple love bla bla bla.

i want need someone that understand my heart.

I'm been struggling with reality lately. visions of nightmares become truth and fire never burned this much. i plea sanity but whats she in such an insane world ?

loneliness

I've always struggled with this n i know it may never change no better how hard i try.

it may seem like i have a lot of friends but in all actuality, its far from the truth . .

when you taught to only love ones self, its hard trying to love another. its a constant fight that i have to deal with somebody realize thats all i really have . . loneliness

sometimes i wonder if all our live really have a purpose ? i know we are all taught to have some sort of religion to guide us n comfort us, but what if we are just soul less vessels ? sometimes i think to myself, why bother trying ? why is life even worth living ? then i look back n say, we must have a purpose, I'm going to pursue it no matter the consequences are . .

I'm the type of person who looks more into what life is. trying to figure our existence n our purpose. we all have our destiny. what is yours ?

now, Feb 24 . .

i feel like I'm not from this time. like I'm more advanced for what people my age think. if people actually knew the things i know, this world would be a lot more chaotic then it is now . . . 

CONSTANTLY UPDATING, SO STAY TUNED ON MY BLOG